how things go.

grief finds me in funny spots: while i'm putting new sheets on the bed. when i turn from the kitchen sink to the trash can. when i find myself on the couch, watching tv. when i walk out of the bathroom. all times when i never used to be alone, there in my peripheral sight was this dark spot, this minnie-sized absence of light, trying to get in my way, trying to catch some dropped food, just simply guarding me, making sure i was ok.

we have already received more sympathy cards than i think will come after i die.

those other two dogs aren't taking kindly to absences these days. the boy was out most of the evening last night and the two of them just looked at me with sorrow and confusion, when they looked at me at all, as if to say, what, now he's gone, too?

i long for the days when sarah palin was amusing enough to distract me from all of this. when i could laugh at her sheer ridiculousness. Now i'm scared enough to avoid thoughts of her, as well.

and so. i've been letting work overwhelm me. i've been losing myself in instant netflix and dinners out. i have spent a lot of time playing bejewled on the computer. and a good amount asleep, too.

i would like for fall to begin. i think i will feel comforted by a nice warm scarf.