just add a 2 to that 3 on the cake...

thirty-two, at 5:35 pm this afternoon, except then, i was three, at my tante fia's house. and i wasn't the only one in a crown, i think everyone had one. i look a little, wierd. was i singing? did i have a head cold? was i a boy in a big peter pan collar? don't know. i don't look thrilled, though, do i? a little hesitant. a little puzzled. i look uncomfortable in that high backed chair. i wonder if i was sitting on a phone book. i wonder if that tin foil crown was cutting into my head behind my ears. i wonder if i knew then that, 29 years later, i would have the same haircut.

i've been a little sad lately. listening to jawbreaker and trying to resist the urge to quote "sadding around". but that's ok. i can do it. see? i did.

thirty two finds me away from portland for 14 months, still pining. missing my best friends, my apartment, my school (wha?), the number 19 bus, winter coats. have yet to carve much of a niche out for myself here, but that might change soon. i am in a period of transition, and i am, always, reticent of change. so its going a little bit slower than it might, if i were a more hearty person.

but yes, enough with the boohoo. happy birthday to me. i have been fielding phone calls and texts all morning, the boy got up and moved my car at six in the morning, cause i forgot about street cleaning (what? the street cleaners don't have my birthday off?) and i had chocolate chip cookies for breakfast, one, cause its my birthday and two, cause i'm a grown up now and i'm allowed.

its beautiful weather out today, and i'm thinking of going to the beach later and riding on the ferris wheel. and we are having a dinner later and my mom is bringing cupcakes. and i might just make myself a tin foil crown. and have another cookie, no?

Comments

Tracy said…
hope you had that cookie... 32 is a very good year. enjoy. happy birthday
Nika said…
happy belated birthday!! i hope it was wonderful. that photograph is adorable!

my boss and i (both aquarians also--her b-day was on valentine's) had some exchanges regarding coincidences in the aquarian horoscope for the coming year. in summary: it looks to be a good year for change. no more foot dragging! sometimes change is very positive and necessary.

(i joined a gym that week...the only other time i have set foot in a gym was in school. i didn't even think about it until she and i were talking about the "if you were born on...blah blah" horoscope clipped out of the newspaper and left on her desk.)

inspiring? possibly? i can hope, but it is all rainy and february-ish, which translates to "fuck it, i'm taking a nap." so i will save the world, make a masterpiece and maybe even go to the gym, uh, later.